i read my old posts... suddenly... ppl who say i tian zhen, yes i am... i admit... too sha to trust myself to trust ppl... ppl always wash my mind... but it nv go away... i'm stubborn...

y love a person until so deep and it always hurt e most... y last time i wont hav tis feeling when i was with wai ming? my parents told my abt their story... my bros and sister dun even noe how hard they earn and raise them up... my parents nv even told them abt their story... i'm e 1 one to listen... now i noe y dad nv talk to his own mother bcos he hate her for being negleted e 3 bros... suffering... dad need to quit sch when he's sec 2 bcos of he need to raise his own bros up when they r still small... i didnt noe my dad and mum suffer so much in their path... where gt parents who dun dote their own sons and daughters? even how hard it goes... parents will help... they wont see u suffer... 1wks of sickness during confinement... cant get up on my bed... keep fevering... they helped me to change my clothes when i'm sweating... feed me straight in my mouth when i'm lying on my bed... go find god and ask wat happen to me... eat chinese med... seeing those weird weird things in my room... talking nonsense when i wake up... dunno sms wat too my frens... now even how much i ate... my whole body like floating... lying on e bed too long and get up nearly black out... really dun hav e strength... i dun even hav e strength to carry my own son... my body felt so weak... lack of slp... no appetite to eat but i try to eat finish everything... felt so useless now... sun auntie going back le... i hav to take care of myself... i hope i can handle...